NOG To Offer Personal Obstruction Devices

BDM has learned that the New Ownership Group (NOG) of the Red Sox is planning to distribute self-contained pole obstructions for any fan who wishes one during the 2009 season. This new policy comes in the wake of many complaints by the few ticket-holders who have a completely unobstructed view of the entire ball-park. Many of these fans report being "cheated" out of the true Fenway Park experience—i.e., obstructed views, narrow cramped seats and lack of simple 21st century amenities like cup-holders.

A completely un-reliable source reported to Boston Dust Mites that the hand-held obstruction devices (dubbed "HOD" by the NOG) are designed to give only the seat-holder the bad view and not infringe on neighboring fans. Sox CEO Larry Lucchino reportedly nixed the idea of charging $7.50 for each HOD noting, "We held the line on ticket prices, we're not going to gouge our fans for the right to have a classic Fenway Park experience."

If the HOD Project goes well, the NOG has plans to offer "seat constrictors" for the few wide seats in the Park as well as Allen wrenches for luxury seat owners to take off their cup-holders to be more in tune with the "average fan" experience.