Thursday, September 25, 2014

Rumor: NOG Planning Big Ceremony For Zobrist

(Getty Images)
Fans should get to Fenway Park early tonight! Completely unreliable sources have informed Boston Dust Mites that the Red Sox will hold an on-field pre-game ceremony to honor the final 2014 appearance at Fenway of Tampa super-utility man Ben Zobrist. Details are sketchy, but we do know there will be a video tribute on the big screen—showing Zobrist in all nine positions on the diamond in his illustrious career. 'Amazing Grace' will be played by the Methuen Chapter of The Sons Of Glasgow during the video rendition. Event guru Dr. Charles "The Mad Dentist" Steinberg is said to be planning a few more touching tributes—including the appearance of 73-year old Red Sox "Super Sub" John Kennedy. And, as a special momento, Zobrist will be awarded a gift certificate from his local "utility", Tampa Electric. It should be a thrilling night.

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