Monday, February 13, 2012

REPORT: Wally Held In Logan Showdown

In a move that is sure to endear him once again to Red Sox fans, Wally The Green Monster took radical action today—attempting to block the departure of the new Red Sox-themed jet from taking off to Fort Myers (see pic).

The reason for his actions? According to our usually unreliable Boston Dust Mites sources, Wally is so upset that the team has no everyday shortstop, right-fielder or fourth and fifth starters, that he decided to take his symbolic act of civil disobedience. Massachusetts State Police personnel could be seen trying to talk Wally down off a tarmac vehicle which he positioned in front of the multi-million dollar jetBlue plane.

The stand-off continued until Wally was told that Jose Iglesias will be invited to Spring Training. Wally is being held on $1.6 million bail and is scheduled for arraignment in Boston Municipal Court on Tuesday. Reportedly, celebrity lawyer Jose Baez will represent the mascot. According to our unreliable sources anyway.

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